email etiquette for online dating success – part one
I one read an article, that had some hints and tips for adult dating online, and the thing I remember most is the advice on the emails. Anyone who has had a profile on an adult dating site knows that sometimes you are left wondering where people are going with the language in their emails. It’s bad enough that you don’t get facial expressions to work with, and add to the fact that different people have different ways of talking and typing, you con sometimes be left wondering if things are going forward with the chances of the real life hook up.
I am not going to go into the nuances of the various ways to communicate via email. There are so many things to consider when reading (and writing) emails, it would take pages. There are a few things to consider when sending and receiving emails in regards to dating online however.
When you write an email, try to read it back to yourself without and inflections. Try to be a computer reading word for word, literally. Don’t bring your voice up and down like you would in normal conversation. Will the person getting you email be able to grasp what you are trying to say?
If you don’t know the person on the other end of the email very well, consider that they probably don’t know your personality well, and if you always speak with sarcasm, they most certainly will not read that sarcasm in your emails.
If you want to really test to see if your online dating communications are getting you closer to the offline dating scenario, write your messages with open ended questions. Give the other person the chance to write more than just a yes or no. If you want someone to continue messaging you and get to know you better always end your email with another question.
If you message someone with an answer and no question, then how are they to know that you want them to keep messaging you? By the same token if you get an email that have a simple answer and no further questions to lead you into further communication, you may have to take this as a polite way of answering you, but basically not inviting you to continue conversating. At least they answered your email, most of the time they won’t. But don’t keep sending emails if all you get is answers and no request for further information.