• Relationship Advice 01.01.2008

    I’ve seen these suggestions made for making relationships healthier and happier before, but it’s nice to see them made again, and sometimes we need to remind ourselves that it is okay, and healthier to do some of these things. Putting a priority on relationships and intimacy and putting a pause on some things like kids or overworking is not a bad thing, it’s a healthy thing to do. It’s nice to see other experts making these suggestions, letting us know that is alright.

    Found via yahoo health:

    * Tell your kids no! According to the old rules of parenting, children come before everything else, including your marriage. Well, out with the old and in with the new! Your marriage should be your number one priority, and your children should see and respect the importance and beauty of your marriage.

    Make time for your spouse, even if it means denying your kids’ wishes every once in a while. Don’t worry, they will still be well-rounded children without that extra music class — and they will benefit from seeing your happy, healthy marriage.
    * Rediscover your bedroom. Make your bedroom a sanctuary for you and your partner. This is a private space where you can talk and bond with your spouse. This means no cribs in the corner or kids sleeping in between you every night! Keep your bedroom kid-free and clutter-free.

    You should also remove the television from your bedroom, since studies have shown that bedroom televisions detract from both rest and marital bonding. Get your sitcom fix before heading to the bedroom — consider it a sacred space for only you and your partner.
    * More than just a date night. Conventional marital wisdom tells us to schedule a date night once a week. This is good advice, but we also need to remember to schedule time without the expectation of intimacy at least once a week. Use this time simply to talk with your spouse, or even just cuddle and laugh. One caveat: You are not allowed to discuss errands, grocery lists, or report cards! This is relationship time.
    * Who do we appreciate? A recent study found that people who kept a gratitude journal, in which they wrote down things they were grateful for, were less likely to be stressed and unhappy than people who did not keep a journal.

    The same rule of appreciation applies to relationships. The more you express appreciation to your partner, the better you will both feel. Remember to say “thank you” for the amazing things your partner does (especially the small things), whether it is loading the dishwasher or remembering your favorite candy at the drugstore.
    * Keep it exciting. When things get dull in your relationship, you will feel the effects of it throughout your life. If you want to keep your relationship exciting, you will have to get out of your comfort zone. Try adventure dating in which you go on a roller coaster, see a scary movie, or even go bungee jumping!

    The dopamine and adrenaline which flood your brain during these experiences are similar to the initial butterflies you felt when first dating your spouse, so get out there and go on an adventure! Even if you aren’t the daredevil type, you can break out of your routine by trying a new restaurant and investigating a new part of the city.
    * Don’t lose yourself. Every couple needs time apart to explore their own interests and develop their own friendships. Don’t forget your “me” time in 2008, whether it means reconnecting with lost friends, taking a class, or joining an exercise program. Agree to allow your partner the same freedom, and swap babysitting duties while the other person gets to enjoy his relaxation duties.

    Posted by Steven @ 9:31 pm for Relationship Advice |

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